18 weeks - Baby E 2

 

How far along: 

18 weeks and a few days! I can't believe how quickly it is flying by!

Total weight gain:

I am still stuck at about 13 or 14 pounds lost. I stopped losing weight though and have stayed about the same the past few weeks, probably will start gaining very soon.

Size and growth of the baby: 

About the size of a bell pepper! 5 and a half inches long and about 7 ounces :)

 

Sex:

Not sure yet, but almost everyone is still thinking girl. I guess we will see!
Looking forward to the ultrasound in two weeks!

Maternity clothes: 

Some things I am, some things I'm not. Still don't feel very big. My doctor even commented on how well my stomach muscles are holding baby in for my second child, especially one so close after my first! 

 

Sleep:

Good. I am tired all the time. Sleep sleep sleep.

Best moment(s) of the week: 

Making progress on our new bedroom! We love working on projects and changing things up...and I am so excited for what our new room will look like when it is done. And then we can start working on the nursery and making a playroom upstairs :) so much to do before the new baby comes!

Movement: 

Yes, definite movement :) :)

Food cravings/aversions:

Same same. I have oddly been craving salads this time around. Yum!

Morning sickness:

Much better. My hormones must switch around 17-18 weeks, because this was about the same time I started feeling a little better with Reagan too.

Symptoms: 

Movement and crampy off and on. Won't be able to sleep on my belly much longer because I feel like I am squishing the baby. I am not a belly sleeper normally anyway, but why all the sudden now that I am not allowed to does it suddenly sound so comfy?!

Labor signs: 

Nope.

Belly button in or out:

In.

What I miss:

I am starting to get nostalgic about Reagan not being the only child much longer. I know he will LOVE having a sibling, but I am going to miss it just being him. I don't know. I guess I feel a little sad with how drastic his world is going to change in a few months, and how I won't always be there when he needs me or wants my attention. At the same time I am so so so looking forward to him and the baby interacting together :)

What I'm looking forward to: 

Our ultrasound! Very soon and we can know the gender! 

If you want to follow this pregnancy I will link up below.
12 weeks with Baby E 2

15 weeks with Baby E 2

When your heart just hurts.

I have always thought death and heartache seem to come in waves.

These past few weeks it just seems like there has been one thing after another, and my heart just feels so heavy.

A young beautiful woman who was engaged to one of Matt's good friends. We were planning to go to their wedding next week.

A young energetic guy who was one of my cousins best friends.

Word of a couple really struggling in their marriage after losing a young child a short time ago.

A classmate of my sisters in critical condition from an accident.

This all just sounds like typical everyday stuff to most people.

But when it strikes over and over again in a small community it shakes us to our core.

That is the thing about small towns; when tragedy does strike...it really does have an effect on everyone.

As a small town family, we are hurting right now.

We are hurting for their families, we are hurting for their friends, we are hurting because we too in some way were affected and knew them.

Right now we don't understand, and we are going through all different stages of grief at all different times.

But one thing I do know, is we will eventually move on.

It may take weeks or months, but our lives will go back to normal.

We will still miss them, and we will probably think of them off and on, but our lives will more or less return to our same, typical, everyday life.

But for their families, the people they were closest to...their lives will never be the same.

They will always have that void in their life.

Holidays, and birthdays, big monumental life events...that person is no longer there with them.

So it is in that time that we need to remember to surroud them with love.

They will be overwhelmed with people coming by right now, offering sweet words, or just listening and crying with them. 

They will have people bringing flowers and cards and food a lot over the next few weeks and months. 

But remember to support them years from now.

Send them a card or give them a hug when you run into them.

Let them know that their loved one has not been forgotten - that their hearts haven't been forgotten.

I feel like I am pretty well-versed in death.

I feel like I have experienced it to quite some degree for someone of my age.

I feel like I know how to help others cope.

To know what to say or when to listen.

But if I am being honest...I am so scared of death.

I can't say that if I was to experience death so close to home like I did when I was younger that I would handle it with such grace as I handle dealing with the loss of acquaintances of other people I knew.

Actually, I am fairly certain that I wouldn't.

When I hear of all these tragedies and so much pain, I can't help but think that our world is still so flawed.
The Lord is coming one day to make all things new, but right now we will never experience heaven on earth.
There will always be pain and heartache.
One day our tears will be wiped away and we will be free from this world.
What is that quote from that song? "because the pain that you are feeling, can't compare to the joy that's coming!"
And while that may fall on deaf ears and hurting hearts right now...we never know what God has in store, but I do know that we can't fathom how great the outcome will be!

I read earlier today something that said "don't pray for someone, when you can pray WITH someone." and I thought that was pretty clever.

While praying for people during this time is important, I think just coming around them and bringing them before the Most High when they are in such a vulnerable state could do a world of measure. Just being there with them and allowing them to feel whatever they are feeling and letting them know that it is ok. And sometimes...maybe you just need to cry with them.

Eddies obituary and an "in memory of Eddie" event keep popping up in my newsfeed.
Hundreds of people (literally) keep popping up and writing on Kassandra's wall.
I keep seeing people writing updates to how Kyle is doing.
All 3 of them are such special people. So energetic and so loved.
We will never be able to hide from it or push it aside and try to forget about it what happened - what is happening. 
So surround yourselves with people you love.
People to encourage you.
People to pray for you.
And know that it is ok to feel whatever you are feeling.
If you just want to cry..that is ok.
Or maybe you just feel numb...like...is this really happening?
If you are angry and screaming out...that's ok too. God can handle it.
Just don't try to do it alone.

           "For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them." - Matthew 18:20

I mean...what a better place to be than in the comfort of the Prince of Peace himself?

15 weeks - Baby E 2

 

How far along: 

15 weeks and a few days!

Total weight gain:

I lost a few more pounds since last time. I got really sick and dehydrated last week, so I am probably around 13 or 14 lost total. Gotta start gaining soon!

Size and growth of the baby: 

About the size of an apple! 4 inches long and about 2 and a half ounces. Little peanut :)

Sex:

Not sure yet, but almost everyone is still thinking girl. I guess we will see!

Maternity clothes: 

Pants - not shirts. Still don't feel very big.

Sleep:

Good. And with all this time up north Reagan is completely wore out. He slept 13 hours the other night! Matt and I woke up about 9:30 and were so confused as to what time it was...and when we realized it was so late we immediately ran to check on Reagan. He was fine :) snoozing away.

Best moment(s) of the week:

This has been a long week. 4th of July was fun spending time with family though. Reagan loved the fireworks!

Movement: 

I feel like the past week or so that I have started feeling little flutters. Seems really early, but it feels like exactly what I remember those first few times with Reagan felt like.

Food cravings/aversions:

Nothing really sounds good still.

Morning sickness:

It came back with a vengeance this week when I got a really nasty cold and ended up in the hospital.

Symptoms: 

Not much unusual. Feeling crampy off and on.

Labor signs: 

Nope.

Belly button in or out:

In. Although it is definitely a completely different bellybutton since my pregnancy with Reagan.

What I miss:

Food. This happened with Reagan too. My taste buds just change so drastically and nothing ever sounds good or tastes good. I miss just feeling really really good.

What I'm looking forward to: 

This weekend! I always look forward to time with my little family :)


If you want to follow this pregnancy I will link up below.
12 weeks - Baby E 2 

Happy Birthday, Erin!

My little sister turns 18 today, so in honor of her birthday and her having just graduated, I figured I would write a nice lovely post about her.

I don't remember you being born, but based on pictures, you were a little big chunk of love. Emphasis on the chunk :)

Then around the ages of 2-4 you turned into the CUTEST little child ever. Seriously, THE. CUTEST!

I don't really remember you annoying me much, but I am sure you did over the next few years, because I was smack dab in the middle of the pre-teen/teen/hormone drama years. I wonder if you remember the woes of listening to me cry while yelling "my ponytail is crooked!"

I remember thinking how cute it was when you were the ONLY girl ever invited to boys birthday parties and making fun of you when boys tried to kiss you. See...I wasn't the only one who thought you were the cutest little girl ever :)

And then...the awkward years.

We made fun of your hard, different, cardboard? hair.

The few years where you were a little more chubby.

And somewhere right around that time we doubled our family size and added 4 little kiddos, and you suddenly became a big sister.

You might be the one who gets the most frustrated with them from time to time, but you were also the one who grew up with them. I remember watching you guys together many times over the years and thinking "wow...they act just like siblings." How you fight, how you play, just how you interact together. Your relationship is different with them than mine is, because I was already moved out of the house at the time they came.

It has been so fun watching you grow into a big sister role. You really weren't made to be a baby anyway...you need someone to boss around ;)

And then somewhere in those high school years you grew into the most beautiful woman.

You are so different than me. So bubbly and outgoing. Everyone's friend. You got long skinny legs instead of short, stocky Holmes legs. And somehow you got skin about 8 shades darker than me.

Totally a little bit jealous about the legs and the tan.

You are about 99% exactly like our dad, but then you are also a lot of times the most sensitive.

I am fairly sure everyone has seen you cry a time or two.

Or laughed at the wonderful climatic point in your story telling :)

It literally seems like just yesterday you were in elementary.

And now in the blink of an eye you are off to college.

Up until this point I have never gotten emotional at graduations. Not my own, not Jena's, or my husbands, but for some reason at yours, I was. I don't know if I have just grown up a lot this past year or what. I guess having a baby will do that to you. But I just remember looking at all those kids. Those little babies. Kids I used to babysit (yes...that made me feel really old) and all I could think was "they are way too young." And now they are all being shipped off different directions into the big bad world and it is scary.

You have to make financial decisions on your own, and make new friends, and go shopping on your own, and learn how to navigate college courses and homework and a job...and you just have SO MUCH to learn! And I guess it just made me a little sad to think of them all leaving the comfort and  safety of home and heading out on their own.

But on the plus side, it is so much fun! You get to study and learn more about what you love! You get to start living your life the way you choose to. Making your own decisions. You can even choose to do your dishes backwards like you all make fun of me for doing all the time...because you are growing up and you get to choose to do that. Maybe you will make new friends...and maybe they will be lifelong friends. And with how friendly and outgoing you are I am sure that is a possibility.

So I look forward to watching you over the next few months as you adjust to this new season of life.

I am sure a lot of tears will be shed, but I am sure you will have a lot of fun too.

I am sure you will make a lot of mistakes, just learn from them and grow and move on.

I am sure you will get lonely...and sad. But your family isn't too far away. Ask mama how many trips she made ALLLLLL the way down to Spring Arbor, because I was lonely and scared and couldn't do it. And just think how much closer you are than I was :)

And just think how close Matt and I are. Just a hop and a skip away. You are always welcome to stay with us if you want a little familiar interaction. Plus...I am counting on you so we can get a few date nights out ;)

So if you actually made it all the way through all that...because I know how much you love overly wordy things....just like me ;) I just want to say...

Happy Happy Birthday, Erin! I love you!